I'm Here and I Stay
by MKAmericanhero
Summary: We haven't seen much of Waverly dealing with the fact that she was driven to almost killing herself. Here's my take on her opening up to Nicole about what happened. As an aside: reach out for help if you need it folks.


**I need to update my fosters story, but this popped into my head after the episode aired. My first time writing for this show and these characters so give me a little room for error.**

In the early hours of morning, Nicole turned over and reached out expecting to feel Waverly underneath her surplus of blankets. She was surprised to find the spot next to her cold and this woke her up. She sat up in bed and looked around Waverly's room and worried when she didn't see her girlfriend. Nicole got out of bed and put on a hoodie before heading downstairs to look for her lover.

When she reached the kitchen, she saw Wynonna sitting at the table drinking coffee. Before Nicole spoke Wynonna pointed out the window to the barn.

"She's been out there for about 20 minutes." Nicole looked out to see the sun barely starting to rise over the barn.

"It's freezing out there, wheat's she doing in the barn?"

Wynonna shrugged her shoulders and sipped her coffee. "No idea, probably a job for her girlfriend though."

"Or her big sister." Wynonna shook her head. "I tried when I woke up and found her down here. It's your turn at bat hot stuff."

Nicole smirked at the joke, "You're real proud of yourself for that one aren't you."

"I am. Now go fix my sister please." Nicole bundled up in her coat and boots, grabbed an extra blanket and headed out to the barn. When she got into the barn she found Waverly sitting in the corner, just looking at her hands.

"You know, we have a perfectly good bed inside where it isn't 10 degrees and you could ponder the universe in there." Waverly forced a smile, but didn't look up. Nicole took a seat next to her and wrapped them both in the blanket.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Couldn't sleep." Nicole nodded and pulled Waverly closer. "Bad dreams?"

Waverly nodded.

"Waves, come on, talk to me."

Waverly took a deep breath before she tried to explain what had happened, "when I was in the greenhouse with Jolene…the things she was saying, the things she made me believe…" Nicole kissed the side of Waverly's head.

"Baby, she was a demon who tried to kill you since you were born. I wouldn't swell on anything she said."

"That's why I'm angry, I did believe her and what she said and I almost…" Waverly trail off and let a few tears fall, leaving Nicole to brush them away.

"You almost what baby?"

Waverly took a shaky breath. "She gave me this knife and kept saying that no one loved me and that I would do the right thing if I did it."

"Waves?"

"She pointed the knife at me and kept taunting me about how no one loved me and I almost did it…She tried to get me to kill myself and I almost did." Nicole took a deep breath and tried to calm her own anger at the dead entity. She pulled Waverly closer and let her cry out her fear and frustration.

"Waverly, baby, I'm so sorry I wasn't able to help you, but I'm here now and you didn't listen to her so you're still here too. Now tell me what I can do to make you feel better."

Waverly shook her head. "I don't know, I just don't want to feel that way ever again. I was alone and it felt so hopeless. Maybe she's right, maybe I'm not loveable because of who I am."

"Hey, I love who you are. She was a demon Waves, her goal was to break you down, but she picked the wrong Earp to fuck with."

"I'm not even an Earp, I'm just a parasite on this family." Nicole pushed the blanket off and kneeled in front of Waverly. "Hey, Wynonna may be the heir, but you are as much as an Earp as she is. And baby you give so much to others there is no way you're a parasite on this family."

Waverly seemed to consider what Nicole was saying, but her inner demons still bothered her.

"I just felt…so empty and it was such a dark place."

"Waverly, on my life, I swear I won't ever leave you to deal with that kind of darkness alone." Waverly smiled a sad smile and looked at Nicole.

"You'd still love me if I went back to that dark place?"

"I will love you always and if you have those thoughts again, you tell me and we'll figure it out."

Waverly shivered, suddenly aware of how cold she was. "I think I'd like to of back inside." Nicole nodded and stood up, taking Waverly's hand and pulling her up with her. She kissed her briefly before they made their way to the house. They entered the house and Wynonna stood when the both were safely inside and out of the freezing temperature. She waited for Waverly to come to her and when she did she held her sister's head in her hands, looked in her eyes and kissed her forehead.

"I love you, always." Waverly nodded and headed upstairs as Nicole took off her layers of clothes. Wynonna turned to the red head, "she talk to you?"

"She did."

"And?"

"Would you trust me ever again if I told you what she told me." Wynonna realized that Nicole had a valid point: her code was very much death before dishonor.

"Fair enough. Just tell me if I need to go hunting for whatever hurt."

"I don't think this is a monster you can kill for her."

Wynonna kicked her feet up onto the kitchen table and she thought about it. "Even without peacemaker I'd kill anything that ever hurt her."

"Easy killer, I got this one."

"If you say so: go get your girl. Just remind her that she's a god damn Earp no matter what anybody says."

"How'd you…"

Wynonna cut her off, "it always comes back to that. I may be the heir, but she is the heart of the Earp bloodline. And I'd get used to the name if I were you."

"Why's that?"

"Oh she'll marry you one of these days my friend. Then you'll be an Earp too, so you know…welcome to the family or whatever."

Nicole smirked, "What makes you think I'll be the one changing her name?"

"Well so far my family line has been a bust, with the exception of baby girl, so I need another Earp around to make me feel better about our bloodline."

Nicole realized this was as close to and "I love you" as she was gonna get from Wynonna Earp.

"I better go check on Waverly…and Wynonna, even if the Earp name was only attached to you, Waverly and your daughter, it wouldn't be a bust because you'd be in it. Don't sell yourself short." Wynonna went back to her coffee and promised herself she would go to her sister later and ask for the details behind her trip to the barn, but for now she knew Waverly was in good hands.

 **So, super short I know, but I wanted to get it out of my head.**


End file.
